EE

One year ago today, June 7, 2010, if you would have told me what the next year of my life was going to look like, I would've thought you were the craziest person on the face of the planet. Nothing could've prepared me for what was ahead of me...just as nothing could make me want to go back and change any of it. The result has been the absolute best thing that anybody could ask for.

Meet Eric and Elizabeth (Liz). Through a series of events, these two people came into my life and have forever changed it...in a very good way. I met Eric and Liz on January 6, 2011. On January 11, they found out that their lives would never be the same again. As it turns out, neither would mine. On that day we became a family. None of us, or anyone around us, had any idea what that would come to mean or even how it all made sense, but slowly it began to make sense to the three of us, absolute perfect sense. And looking back we wouldn't have it any other way.

Now meet the three people in the picture: Eric, Elizabeth, and the bundle of joy that forever changed their lives, Grace Lindsay. See on July 31 I found out I was pregnant, on January 11 I told Liz and Eric that they would finally have the one thing that they had been praying for throughout their 12 years of marriage: a baby. And on March 30, 2011 at 12:36pm that dream became a reality when little Grace Lindsay arrived weighing in at 7lbs 3oz and 20in long. I chose to give Grace up for adoption to Liz and Eric.

That is a lot to throw out there, I know. 10 weeks, well really about 50 weeks has gone by now and I feel that is important to stop hiding. It has been a long journey, definitely very hard, but also very rewarding. I spent a great deal of time feeling ashamed and I have hit the point where I am done feeling that way. I have nothing to be ashamed of. I did what I knew in my heart was right. I have not one single regret.

I believe that God put me through all of this for a reason. I'm still trying to figure out how he wants me to use this experience, but I believe sharing it is the beginning. Over time I will take you through more of the details of the story, why I made the decision that I made, the tough parts of it, and the good parts. Ultimately I hope the others are encouraged, I hope that maybe even one person in my shoes reads this and is comforted in knowing that they are not alone. Sharing emotions and feelings is most definitely not something I was gifted with doing. I prefer logical, straight-forward facts. However nothing about this story is necessarily logical. It is smothered with emotions and feelings. I have had to learn to get in touch with that side of myself through this experience. I am still learning...even as I type this right now I am tempted to delete it all and instead write about the person I just saw outside of my house driving the wrong way on a one-way. Retarded Co-Op shoppers... See my point? On a more serious note: telling my story is another way for me to learn how to experience more emotion. So bear with me if it doesn't always make sense or if it comes in more pieces than a Big Ben jigsaw puzzle.